The first three years of a child’s development are the most meaningful, because they are the first sets of interaction that they have with the world that surrounds them. Essentially, those first three years are the foundation or the base, for who the child is going to be, and how he or she will grow up. In these first years, they gradually begin to form relationships with others and things like trust and attachment are also formed. Many researchers and theorists focused on the topic of attachment for so long, and conducted various studies to try and understand attachment and the impact it had on child development, because they knew attachment was an essential part of the developmental process that occurs in infancy and toddlerhood.
Attachment impacts a child’s social and emotional development; it plays a role in the child’s ability to have trust, to form and maintain relationships with others, and being able to properly regulate their emotions. Attachment is something that is important all throughout the child’s lifetime, however, the first three years hold the biggest significance because, as we previously stated, the first experiences a child has, forms a groundwork for all future relationships. The journal article, “‘Am I safe here and do you like me?’ Understanding complex trauma and attachment disruption in the classroom” states that “Neurobiological research provides evidence to support Ainsworth’s earlier work…suggesting a developmental period of stress-related vulnerability from six months to four years of age” (O’Neill, Guenette, Kitchenham, 2010). Those first experiences build off and continue to make in impact on the child, even as they get passed the infant and toddler stage.
Through those first experiences is how we end up with children with insecure and secure attachment or children who suffer from attachment disorders. It is essential to understand the huge role attachment plays in the development of a child and the fact that early quality care experiences DO have an influence on development. It is a topic that should continue being discussed because it should be fostered and applied in both the home and school setting. Attachment is much more than interactions between the infant and the parent, it is the bond that is created over time.
There is not just one definition that exists for the term attachment, however, we know that it involves a continuous, loving and responsive relationship with an infant. The textbook, Infants, Toddlers, and Caregivers: A Curriculum of Respectful, Responsive, Relationship-Based Care and Education, written by Janet Gonzalez-Mena and Dianne Widmeyer Eyer, provides a clear definition for the term. It defines attachment as “an affectionate bond between two individuals that endures through space and time and serves to join them emotionally” (Gonzalez-Mena, Eyer, 2012). Attachment is much more than physical interactions between the infant and the caregiver, it is a bond that is gradually built over time; a bond that involves trust, consistency, reliability, care, and affection.
Attachment is more than just a caregiver meeting an infant’s needs; it is meeting the child’s needs, while at the same time, ensuring and teaching them that they are there to care for them, to provide for them, and to make sure that they are safe. Theorist, John Bowlby, is famously known for his contribution to the attachment theory, where he suggested that children form one special, emotional bond throughout their lives, which essentially, act as a structure for all other relationships. He stated that disturbing or altering this bond can have a negative impact on the development of a child. The journal article, “Attachment Disorders: Review and Current Status”, written by Samantha L. Wilson, explains that Bowlby broke down and categorized the attachment process into four phases. He explained the first phase to be, where an infant displays specific cues during the first years of life that promote closeness with the caregiver (Wilson, 2001). The cue he is referring to is crying; an infant’s cry is an indicator to the caregiver to provide relief.
Bowlby stated that the second phase started at about 8 to 12 weeks of age, and it was where the infant began to mark a preference for a specific person. However, he did mention that that did not necessarily indicate attachment. The third phase was where the establishment of attachment was actually happening. (Wilson, 2001) Lastly, the fourth phase was where there was “an extension of the original bond into a more sophisticated form of attachment” (Wilson, 2001). There is an importance behind attachment , specifically in the first three years, because through this kind of research, we learn what is the best environment we can create for a child to grow up in, in order to have the best outcome possible.
Along with Bowlby’s four phases of attachment that we previously spoke about, there are four categories that exists that we use to label young children, regarding the relationship they have with their caregivers. The four types of attachment that psychologists have identified are: secure, insecure/avoidant, insecure/resistant, and insecure/disorganized. The journal article, “Attachment in the Classroom”, written by Christi Bergin and David Bergin, introduces and provides detailed explanations of each type of attachment. Christi and David go in depth in their article to explain how these four types were measured and the various factors that can lead to each type of attachment. The first one is secure attachment, the type that we wish all children can have, but unfortunately, that is not the reality. The article, “Four in 10 infants lack strong parental attachments”, written by Rose Huber, that was published on the Princeton University website, stated that approximately 40% of children lack strong emotional bonds, also known as secure attachment, with their caregivers (Huber, 2014).
One factor that was found to contribute to the development of secure attachment was, the caregiver being sensitive to the child and their needs. What this does is, allow the caregiver the ability to better understand the child’s perspective. Being able to understand the child’s perspective is necessary because it helps you realize and take the emotions that the child is feeling, seriously. As adults, we may often forget to do this because the majority of the time, we have a logical explanation to solve the emotions that are being felt within the child. For example, a 2 year old comes to their caregiver crying and saying that they are afraid of sleeping in their own room because they are afraid of possible monsters that might be in there.
We as adults, are aware that monsters do not exist, and we can comfort the child and remind them of that, but it is important to not completely shut their emotion down or push it aside, because although you provided with a logical reason as to why they should not be scared, it does not mean their fear is no longer valid. Being able to simply acknowledge what the child is feeling and listening to them, and letting them know their emotions are valid, makes a huge positive impact on them; it makes it easier for them to continue being able to openly discuss their emotions with you.
Another important factor was the incorporation of high-quality communication (Bergin, Bergin, 2009). Being able to actively engage the child in conversation helps build a strong emotional bond because you are showing the child, starting from a very young age, that you care what they have to say. It helps build secure attachment because those interactions you have with them, even when they are only months old and cannot respond, make a world of a difference. Other factors that were found to contribute to the development of secure attachment were to, provide assistance, model desired behavior, show interest in the activities the child takes part in, and be there to motivate and restore confidence during challenging tasks (Bergin, Bergin, 2009).
All these help build a strong, emotional bond with the child because you’re going past simply caring for their basic, everyday needs; it is going the additional step to prove to the child that you are genuinely interested in being an active participant in their lives. The benefits that children who fall under the category of secure attachment are, that they have the ability to be independent, but also feel the security that they can rely on that one person, even as an adult.
Insecure/avoidant children do not have an attachment to anyone, they are very independent. The reason for this is because their caregivers tend to reject them, be unresponsive, and intrusive (Bergin, Bergin, 2009). Children who fall under the category of insecure or avoidant usually have a difficult time seeking help or being open about their emotions because the caregiver has not attempted to build a relationship with the child where they could have that sense of security and the confidence to reach out and ask for help. We end up with children with insecure and avoidant attachment because the parent does not care about being there emotionally for the child. These caregivers believe that they are doing their part by being there meeting the child’s basic needs. Christi and David explain how a child with this kind of attachment tend to ignore when the parent calls out to them, they turn away from their parents or even completely turn their backs on the parent (Bergin, Bergin, 2009).
All of this happens because the parent was not reliable; children were let down by the parent when they attempted to ask for help or when they needed help. Regardless of the fact that the caregiver has not been reliable nor shown interest or love towards that child, the child may still do things in order to maintain physical closeness with the adult. The result that insecure and avoidant attachment can have on a child is, having difficulty in the long run communicating emotions when in distress. Another conflict that arises from insecure and avoidant attachment is the child will avoid getting emotionally close with anyone (Bergin, Bergin, 2009). Many times it causes the child to slowly close the opportunity of having that closeness with somebody else; for a child, it refers to having that security or trust in another adult, such as a teacher or a coach, and then as time goes on, it refers to the inability to form intimate relationships with other people.
Children who are insecure/resistant often times do not have the ability to explore around independently, due to the fact that caregivers may have difficulty allowing the child the ability to actively and independently engage in play (Bergin, Bergin, 2009). The way that children in this specific category are affected is that they do not find comfort when seeking contact with the caregiver. Factors that lead to this type of attachment are the fact that caregivers do not allow for the child to become independent. Constantly, being there every step of the way can and does have a negative impact on the child’s development because there is a certain point that every child eventually reaches, where they must learn to do things for themselves.
Toddlers must learn to be around other children, learn how to be social. They need to learn how to interact with other people, learn what behaviors are socially acceptable and they cannot do that when the parent does not let these individual experiences happen. This type of attachment is not healthy because the child will continue to grow and will continue to need the parent. Having a infant or toddler get this type of attachment from early on will make them grow up and feel like they are not capable of accomplishing things on their own. They become extremely dependent on the adult and do not have the confidence to venture out.
The last type of attachment is insecure/disorganized. “Infants who demonstrate incomplete, confused, or contradictory behavioral strategies for using the caregiver as a source of comfort have attachments classified as disorganized” (Breidenstine, Bailey, Zeanah, Larrieu, 2010). This type of attachment is usually found in children that come from homes with parents who have a history of mental illness, abuse, loss of death or divorce and/or drug use and abuse (Bergin, Bergin, 2009). The journal article, “Attachment and Trauma in Early Childhood: A Review” is full of information regarding this type of attachment and the drastic, negative effects that it can have on child development. The biggest negative outcome that this type of attachment has on children is that it creates fear against the caregiver.
Children with this type of attachment may almost never find comfort or feel safe around their parent. This has to do with the fact that the caregiver, many times in these types of situations, is unable to be there for the child physically and/or emotionally due to their own struggles they are dealing with. It is difficult to care for someone else when you are struggling to care for yourself. It creates a huge internal conflict for the child because the person that is supposed to be there to help them and comfort them when they need it, is also the person who is creating the immense fear that they constantly feel.
Understanding that caregivers can and do make a tremendous impact on the lives of the children they care for is extremely important. There is an emphasis to the fact that a child’s first three years of life are the most meaningful because parents, guardians, caregivers, etc. need to be aware that the environment they set up for their child, and the effort they input into the relationship with that child does make a huge impact on how the child will develop. The journal article, “The Incredible Years Baby and Toddler Parent Programmes: Promoting attachment and infants’ brain development”, written by Caroline White and Carolyn Webster-Stratton incorporate so much information regarding ways that parents can promote healthy attachment in their children. White and Webster-Stratton explain in their article how one of the main reasons why there is children who do not have strong, emotional attachments is because we often assume that parents will know how to provide this, however, the majority of the time, that is not the case. (White, Webster-Stratton, 2014).
Many parents are not aware of the benefit behind engaging in a conversation with an infant or a toddler, even when they cannot respond, will positively impact the child’s development. Nor are they aware of the fact that something as simple as holding the infant in a loving way, and showing them affection will greatly benefit the child. Many times parents are not aware of this because they did not receive it themselves as a child, it is not something that they had heard or seen before. White and Webster-Stratton, talk about a program called Incredible Years Baby and Toddler Programmes, that emphasizes on attachment, safety, strengthening parent-child relationships at home (White, Webster-Stratton, 2014). Through trained professionals, they work together with parents and educate them on what they can do in order to build stronger attachments with their kids, as well as. Apart from providing them with all this important information, the program models the behavior for the parents and allows them opportunities to practice and implement what they are learning.
A way that attachment can be applied in the home is by, making time to actively interact with your child, whether that be by playing with them or simply taking the time to teach them to do something simple like putting their toys away. Other ways attachment can be applied in the home is by taking advantage of things like, the times where caregivers are dressing or helping the child get dressed in the morning, and use that time to talk to them. Overall, get to know your baby and make sure you provide physical, visual and tactile stimulation (White, Webster-Stratton, 2014).
As important as it is to implement attachment in the home, it is equally as important to implement attachment in a school setting. One of the biggest reasons why relationships between teacher and student should be given more importance is because, attachment to teachers has been linked to school success (Bergin, Bergin, 2009). Teachers should get to know the children that they are working with and make an effort to build a relationship where trust and respect can be established. Ways that attachment can be implemented in schools is by allowing students who have built a strong bond with their teachers to continue moving up (to the next grades) with their teacher. Doing this allows for more time for the emotional relationship that has been built to continue on and to get stronger. It also relieves the child of the stress of having to start the relationship process all over with a new teacher every time. Attachment is an important concept that should be spoken about and applied even at school because teachers can make a positive impact on the lives of students who do not have secure attachment.
Attachment in the first couple of years is crucial because the infant is essentially like a blank canvas and whatever you engrave on it or paint on it, it will stick to them forever. There is a reason why this topic is constantly brought up for discussion, and it’s because what we give our children, starting from the first days of life until the last ones, matters. Parents, guardians, caregivers, etc. have always made the biggest impact and have the biggest effect on a child. What we provide them in the first three years is what we are building them to start life with. Attachment is something that is important all throughout the child’s lifetime, however, the first three years hold the biggest significance because they are what forms the groundwork for all future relationships.
