This paper will discuss theories on Spiritual Discernment as described by Horton (2009), followed by a self-reflection on my personal thought process and which approach I most relate. I will also include an examination into my personal influences, culture and background which had a significant impact on my current beliefs. Following this analysis, I will apply a practical approach to how I plan to avoid any value conflicts with clients or students who may have a different value and belief system.
Personal Position
I have always been a person that relies heavily on personal evaluation of a situation and performing a very practical evaluation of pros and cons and making a decision based on this assessment. When necessary, I will consult with someone to get feedback or a different thought process and then work with that advice as well as my own analysis. After reading the article Discerning Spiritual Discernment: Assessing Current Approaches for Understanding God’s Will by Dennis Horton (2009), it became evident that for a Christian, there is much more involved in the decision making process and it is important to understand your personal approach. On a daily basis, there are numerous decisions that will need to be made, both simple and complex, and understanding more in depth about your belief system can impact your future decision making and potentially lead to better choices.
There are three major approaches discussed by Horton (2009). He describes the Bull’s Eye Approach as one in which people believe that God has a plan for each and will reveal this plan (p.8). The Wisdom Approach is divided into two categories including Biblical Wisdom and Pragmatic Wisdom. Those who follow the Biblical Wisdom rely on the scriptures to help provide guidance, whereas within the Pragmatic Wisdom approach, a person relies on seeking advice from trusted sources, common sense and an evaluation of his or her own capabilities (Horton, 2009). The final approach discussed by Horton is the Relationship-Formation Approach. This differs in that the person does not believe that God has a specific plan for your life, rather, the person makes choices which leads him or her towards a deeper relationship with Christ (Horton, 2009).
At the end of the article, Horton (2009) provided a survey asking about the importance of various aspects in making decisions. Upon completing this survey, I selected the statements that included using my common sense and considering the circumstances, performing self-evaluation of interests, strengths and abilities, responding to others and considering how the decision aligns with the character of Jesus. I also selected consulting wise counsel as being important in this process as well. After reading the descriptions, reviewing the survey and doing much self-reflection, I have determined I fall in between the Relationship-formation and Pragmatic Wisdom approaches.
Fairly recently, I began to struggle with the concept that God has a specific plan for each of us. In the past, I believed that there was a plan and at that time, it gave me comfort to believe in this. However, through the years, this thought process has changed. Now, I do not believe that God has a detailed plan for us but rather believe that God’s given us the abilities needed to make decisions which lead us to live a life that is acceptable in His eyes. In both the Pragmatic Wisdom and Relationship Formation approach, Christians focus more on who we want to be as people in God’s eyes. As it says in Colossians 3:17 (New International Version) “And whatever you do, in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him”. Also, as it says in Luke 12:57 ‘Why do you not judge for yourselves what is right?’ (NIV).
Past and Present Influences
In his article, Vacek (2013) discusses the notion that implicitly or explicitly, we rely on intuition when faced with a decision. These intuitions are impacted by our social roles, cultural upbringing, and moral character. Self-reflection requires thinking about these factors among others to understand our belief system.
I grew up in a “mildly” religious household, meaning that we went to church regularly, my mother would mention keeping a person or situation in our prayers, however, we did not openly pray together, attend bible studies, read the bible outside of church or have conversations centered around religion. Despite being what I have called “Quiet Christians”, it was always obvious to me that we were believers and wanted to live a life that followed Christ. My background in a quiet Christian home most likely explains why I also am not an overt Christian. This also explains my results after taking the Spiritual Gifts Test. I scored the least on Prophecy and Evangelism and highest on Helping and Encouragement. This is certainly consistent with my analysis of being a quiet Christian, however, I attempt to live my life in a way that is caring and shows concern for others.
I was raised in a United Methodist church and Horton (2009) found that many of the people who belong to this denomination follow the Relationship Formation approach to discernment so it is fitting that I would have similar beliefs. Horton (2009) reported that the results of the research found that Methodists were one of the denominations that seeks for a balance between “the head and heart—the rationale and the intuitive—“ rather than seeking specific answers or signs of confirmation from God (p. 22). Another component of Horton’s research that could help explain my belief system is that female students were also found to follow a relationship-formation approach to discernment more often than the pragmatic or Biblical wisdom approach or Bulls-eye approach (p. 23).
As a teenager, I began to go to a different church than my family because the church I attended was primarily an older congregation and I wanted to attend a church with a youth group. Because of this I chose to go to a popular church in my area with other teens which was called a Bible Church. While I enjoyed the people I attended church with, I struggled with the messages. This church had very different beliefs from what I was accustomed to but rather than question or have an open discussion regarding these differences, I stayed quiet and often became uncomfortable when listening to the sermons. I learned later that the minister was a Southern Baptist and I began to understand why I was struggling as the views are much more conservative than mine.
In the article on Spiritual Discernment, Baptists believe more in the Bull’s Eye approach to spiritual discernment (Horton, 2009). This can explain why I struggled with the messages as this is very different from my way of thinking.
When I went away to college and then graduate school, I became inactive in the church. I would go to church with my mother when I came home but overall, I did not make religion a priority. I made some poor choices during this time and basically was “lost” when I reflect on this time of my life. I was not surrounded by active Christians. They were believers but at the same way as I was, they were inactive in their faith. Towards the end of graduate school, I became roommates with an active Catholic and went to Mass with her on occasion.
This was very challenging to me as I was not familiar with the service; therefore, I decided to begin seeking a Methodist Church to attend. I quickly found one and after the first service, it simply felt like home and I began attending on a regular basis, involving myself in the youth group. Each time I moved, I always made it a priority to find a church home again. While I still was a “Quiet Christian”, I felt a significance difference in my life and made the decision that church would be a part of my life.
Unfortunately, one time I moved and simply could not find a home. I tried many churches and simply could not find one that was a good fit. I attempted to go to other churches but found them to be very much out of my comfort zone so once again, I was in a place where once again, I felt lost. It was at this point where I met my future husband and his family. His sister was extremely active in her church and she had a significant impact on me regarding spirituality.
As I mentioned earlier, my thought process changed on my thoughts about God’s plan. While at one time, I relied on this concept to help provide comfort in times of struggle, this belief system changed after supporting my now sister-in-law who was going through a very challenging time in her life. We talked often and there were things she said that affected my current thinking and I began to feel differently, questioning the concept of God’s plan. I began to discount the idea of God having a plan for all of us in its entirety. My sister-in-law was adamant that the obstacles she was facing were God’s plan and she recalled times when she said God spoke to her explaining why she and her daughters had to suffer during these difficult times. While I cannot recall her exact statements, I remember thinking that I no longer believed in the concept of God’s plan.
I did not feel that God’s plan would include the suffering as she had described to me. Rather, I believed that suffering was an unfortunate part of life and God was to be a refuge in times of need. While her experiences changed my thought process, she continued to have a positive aspect on me at the same time. I admired her faith despite her challenging life experiences and respected the way she lived her life devoted to Christ. She made her relationship with God and Jesus Christ a priority in her life and through this example, I hoped that I could do the same.
Through this self-reflection and studying the article by Horton, I tried to find the words to justify my thought process regarding my personal discernment. I came across a quote that sums my feelings up perfectly, “…. reflect on how that decision or experience can be used to fill God’s purpose for you. Ultimately, you are the one in control of your actions and God is here to guide us along the way, not to predetermine our lives” (Edinger, 2016).
My current way of thinking is that everything I do is not part of God’s plan, but under my control. Decisions are based on self-reflection, common sense and guidance and I should make choices and behave in a way that should be acceptable to God. “Free will is a precious gift from God, for it lets us love him with our “whole heart”—because we want to.”—Matthew 22:37
Practical Application
A client comes to you for counseling at her university’s career center. She states she is still struggling to choose a major because, “I am afraid that it may not be God’s will.” From the start, it is evident that she has a different decision-making style than the one you identified for yourself in the first section.
In analyzing the above situation, knowing that it is common to be counseling those who have different beliefs as well as different approaches to decision making, it will be imperative for me not to influence the client based on my personal beliefs. The therapeutic relationship between a counselor and client or student is extremely important to understand. Clients or students come to a counselor for an unbiased person to listen and provide support in times of need resulting in a power differential relationship. This can lead to a potential for an abuse of power. Clients are vulnerable to undue influence and micro-aggressions that can occur when a counselor communicates, verbally or non-verbally personal values that conflict with those of the client (Francis & Dugger, 2014). As a counselor, if you invoke your beliefs or values onto the client, this will disrupt the relationship resulting in distrust and frustration on behalf of the client.
The governing bodies of the profession explicitly address the ethics of this imposition of values. The American Counseling Association’s Code of Ethics (2014) Section A.4.b, it sets forth guidelines regarding personal values. Included in this section is that counselors must be aware of his or her own personal values and avoid imposing these onto the clients. It is also necessary to be respectful of any differences in values or culture of the clients. The National Career Development Association (NCDA) Code of Ethics (2015) also mirrors the American Counseling Association codes stressing the importance of avoiding any imposition of values in Section A.4.b.
Niles and Harris-Bowlsbey (2017) offer suggestions on techniques while will help decrease the likelihood of the imposition of values. These include understanding the variety of values held in society, being aware of your personal values, presenting options in an unbiased manner, understanding the client has the freedom of choice, respecting clients who have values that differ from your own, consulting when needed and considering referral to another counselor is substantial differences exist (p. 415).
Ethical bracketing is another way to avoid transference in the counseling relationship. Ethical bracketing is the practice of purposefully separating one’s personal values from his or her professional values or the intentional setting aside of the counselor’s values to act in an ethical manner when working with clients with differing values (Kocet and Herlihy, 2014). The steps to ethical bracketing include immersion, education, consultation, supervision, and personal counseling. Immersion and education consists of much self-reflection and becoming aware of personal values and how these may conflict with a client. In conflicts that arise, a counselor may need to consult someone and ask for supervision to ensure they are working in an ethical way. In instances where the conflict is significant, personal counseling may be necessary to seek help in personal biases or other barriers that will not allow a person to work in an ethical manner (Kocet & Herlihy, 2014).
In the above situation regarding differences in discernment, understanding my own belief systems as well as the other approaches as described by Horton can enable me to understand or ask questions to learn more about her process in making decisions. By performing self-reflection and understanding my own personal values, I can understand how they value conflict would be a hindrance to the counseling relationship and take all measures to prevent inserting my values and beliefs into the counseling session thus leading to a trusting and respectful therapeutic relationship. I will close with this verse from Ephesians which I feel explains the therapeutic relationship– Ephesians 4:2-3 (NIV): 2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3 Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.
References
- American Counselors Association (2014). Code of Ethics. Retrieved from https://www.aca.org
- Edinger, A. (2016). Why I don’t believe God has a plan. Retrieved from https://www.theodysseyonline.com/.
- Francis, P., and Dugger, S. (2014). Professionalism, ethics, and value‐based conflicts in counseling: An introduction to the special section. Journal of Counseling & Development, 92: 131-134. doi:10.1002/j.1556-6676.2014.00138.x
- Horton, D (2009). Discerning spiritual discernment: Assessing current approaches for understanding God’s will. Journal of Youth Ministry, (7)2.
- Kocet, M. and Herlihy, B. (2014), Addressing value‐based conflicts within the counseling relationship: A decision‐making model. Journal of Counseling & Development, 92: 180-186. doi:10.1002/j.1556-6676.2014.00146.x
- National Career Development Association (2015). Code of Ethics. Retrieved from https://www.ncda.org/.
- Vacek, E. C. (2013). Discernment within a mutual love relationship with God: a new theological foundation. Theological Studies, 74(3), 683+. Retrieved from https://link-gale com.ezproxy.liberty.edu/apps/doc/A341818864/UHIC?u=vic_liberty&sid=UHIC&xid=7e4536c3
