The society that we all live in consists of social institutions, for example educational institution (colleges, tertiary), health care institution (clinics, hospitals), justice system (courts), families and religious institutions (churches, mosques). These social institutions make up the societies that we live in, they are part of the society that govern our behaviors as well as individual expectations. The most dominant of these institutions is the family/families. Macionis & Plummer (2012), define families as key social institution found on all societies, that unites individuals into cooperating groups that oversee the bearing and raising of children. In all societies, men are considered to be head of these families. In attempt to answer this question, there is need to define some terms or concepts used here.
According to Sathiparsad et al (2008), patriarchy is a form of male domination based on the powerful role of a father as the head of the household, and it can be expressed in a multitude of ways. This means men are assigned domination over women who are regarded as subordinate. “However, different ways of being male occur within the broad imbalances of economic, cultural, political, sexual and educational power between males and females and between males and males (Sathiparsad 2008;6). Patriarchy is a form of social organization in which men dominate, oppress and exploit women (Macionis & Plummer 2012). Another concept is gender- which is often used interchangeably with sex whereas they mean different things. Macionis & Plummer (2012) makes the distinction between gender and sex. They state that sex refers to the biological distinction between males and females, this means whether a person is male or female depending on their reproductive organs, external genitals, hormonal states, internal genitals and secondary sex characteristics.
On the other hand, gender refers to the social aspects of differences and hierarchies between male and female. Gender refers to the social meaning of masculinity and femininity. Pertaining to families again, there is gender division of labor- which is the way work is divided between men and women according to their gender roles (Glopp article, 2008). According to this article (Glopp/ILO, 2008), gender division of labor does not necessarily concern only paid employment, but generally their day-to-day lives. It is not fixed bur changes in response to wider economic, political and social changes. This paper will be illustrating how patriarchy works in the gender division of labor, using relevant examples.
Lobola or bride-price is a marriage payment made by the prospective husband or more often, by his family to the family of the bride (His People Joburg 2013). According to Mundudu (2002), lobola refers to the custom of a man paying some form of property, for example cattle, for the right or privilege to marry a woman. Today, money is commonly used instead of cattle to pay lobola. This is a practice that still exists today in southern Africa including Botswana. It is a token of appreciation and respect to the parents of the bride and a way of building relations between the two families. However, the functions and meanings of lobola are constantly changing.
After the paying of lobola that is when the man claims possession of his wife. According to Maisiri (2015), it implies that she now becomes subject not only to the man but also his entire family and by right she is obligated to meet the needs of her husband. The practice or custom of lobola has a significant role and has both positive and negative effect on male and female relations. Maisiri (2015), further adds that lobola is perceived positively as “manifestation of a young man’s love for his wife.” First and fore most on the negative side, this is the practice that when it comes to gender divisions of labor in families, gives men the ideology that they are superior than women and therefore are head of the family. According to Mookodi (2004), bogadi and lobola legitimize gender divisions of labor and perpetuate violence against women.
The practice of lobola is regarded by other people as oppressive to women because it is equated with “buying a wife.” Men tend to forget that bogadi does not mean a business deal because there is no purchasing or trade involved but simple exchange of gifts. This custom can contribute to the man’s power and the woman’s powerlessness: the man increases his power/ control over the woman by arguing that he paid bride-wealth and therefore expects his wife to work hard and give him many children (Maisiri 2015:29-30). The practice of lobola therefore perpetuates patriarchy and renders the man more power and the woman powerless which gives the man the right to do as he pleases.
Because of patriarchy, men and women’s roles are separated in families, both their roles are clearly laid down. Talcott Parson, an American sociologist and a functionalist came up with what is known as the instrumental roles and expressive roles. With this perspective, men should carry out instrumental roles-working outside the family and being the breadwinner whereas women should carry out expressive roles- that is taking care and managing the household. Women generally are expected to take care of the family, meaning taking care of the man, children and other family members, cooking or preparing meals, cleaning the house and doing the laundry.
According to Maisiri (2015), females are regarded as the keepers of the home and their roles and responsibilities are mainly centered in the home. Maisiri further adds that the common notion is that women belong in the kitchen, which express that their domain does not go beyond household responsibilities, especially cooking and providing food. “African women are socialized to stay at home and to spend their leisure time in the home attending household chores, while their male counterparts have more time to visit friends and spend time in public places,” (Maundeni 1999:33). This shows that women have the upper hand in doing most of the activities in the house, the division of labor in the family is largely centered around them. A study conducted by Nyati Ramahobo (1996) in one African country showed that women or girl children cook, sweep yards, do laundry and take care of children while men on the other hand engage in watching television, reading newspapers, going to the movies and other public places as well as washing family cars.
According to the United Nations article (2011), women carry out a disproportionate share of care-related activities world-wide including domestic work which limits their potential to earn income and perpetuates income inequalities between men and women. Regardless of whether women have paid jobs or not, when they get home they start their daily chores as tired as they would be. For example, a woman knocking off from work at 16:30 may stop to buy grocery and snacks for children’s lunch boxes, then afterwards pick the children from school before going home. Upon getting home she prepares supper and cleans the kitchen, then iron the kids’ uniform for the next day while the man is probably doing nothing-just watching television. This gender division of labor due to patriarchy weighs more on women than men.
According to Sathiparsad et al (2008), women’s primary roles were largely to satisfy their husbands sexually and bear children for them. Maisiri (2015) mentions that, African societies in Sub-Saharan Africa are patrilineal, in other words “kinship through males is stressed over kinship through females, it is therefore customary that a woman adopts the husband’s surname and belongs with his family rather than her own biological family of origin. Delo (2015), states that the formation of the family and its structure are expected to depend on the choices of men and women. Traditionally, men do not participate in domestic work including child rearing- such tasks are considered to be the exclusive domain of women.
Women are primarily responsible for bearing and rearing children from birth on; men were only called upon to assist when extraordinary discipline was considered necessary especially for the boys (Asiyanbola 2005; p2-3). The dominance of men over women in families gives men the right to make all decisions concerning the family without consulting the woman. “Failure on the part of women to perform prescribed duties in the home, including conjugal duties, taking care of children and doing the cooking, can result in them being punished by men,” (Maisiri 2015:27). With regard to sex, women at all times are expected to satisfy the sexual desires of the husband. When the man demands sex, the wife must comply without fail. Upon bearing children, women are expected to take care of them, that is bathe them, feed them, take them to school and teach them all the norms, beliefs and practices of their culture- socializing them until they are grown up. In all these, men have no role to play unless called to discipline children.
The rule of men over women in families has resulted in the division of labor being heavily laid on women. Through socialization, children are taught about their beliefs, practices and norms, they are socialized according to gender. Unlike their male counterparts, the socialization of female children emphasizes passivity and submissiveness (Maundeni 1999). The practice or custom of lobola gives men the assumption that they have bought women therefore they should work for them in the house. Women are expected to do the cooking, the laundry, sweep the yard, clean the house, bear children and raise them while men put no effort in all these activities just because they are regarded as the head of the family. According to Maundeni (1999), most African men still believe that it is women’s responsibility to attend household chores and to do this without their help. When African men perform household chores, they believe they are doing their wives a favor. Patriarchy has persisted throughout history through the process of socialization.
