To hell with the OSI 7 Layer Model Back in the 1980’s, when all music sucked and men dressed like fags, a bunch of sissy Europeans got together in a passionate effort to overstandardize computer networking. They created this thing called the Open Systems Interconnection (OSI) networking suite. Anyone who has taken a CS (Computer Science) or CIS (Computer Information Systems) course knows this; they cram this fact down the student’s throat from day freaking one.
It is only when the student enters the real world do they realise that the OSI seven layer model is a sham. First off, what the hell is any European organization doing dictating standards that have to do with computers or networking? (Well…besides that paradigm shifting Linux stuff and all that other huge shit) Hello! How many bleeding edge computer or networking innovations have we seen come out of the European continent? Are they even participating in this revolution? Part of this is not really directly their fault; it probably has something to do with the fact that a minimum of venture capital spent in Europe even goes into high tech; most of it goes into high fashion and entertainment instead. No wonder we booger eating Yanks think the Europeans are sissies. Hey, we may be pigs, but at least we are running the Internet.
Nah nah na-na nah. Secondly, the seven layers proposed by OSI are completely out of touch with reality. The defacto networking standard is TCP/IP. TCP/IP is the grandaddy of XNS, IPX/SPX, Banyan, AppleTalk, and a host of other protocols and pre-dates that seven layer thing because it was funded by the largest organization in the world devoted to maintaining Eurocentric socioeconomic domination; the US Military. And for some reason, that makes it better. Yeah. And yet this seven layer curse won’t go away. Companies still have staffs of Marketing inspired artists drawing up elaborate maps of how their protocol maps to the OSI Seven Layer Model.
Sham! Its a sham I say! To hell with the OSI Seven Layer Model! To its credit, we have found that there are indeed a few things in this world that actually follow the seven layer model; but none of them have anything relevant to do with today’s high tech world. Case in point; the Taco Bell Seven Layer Burrito. You can currently buy one of these babies for just a buck (well, 99 cents anyway) and experience for yourself a portable example of what happens when pure Hispanic culinary brilliance gets flattened into consistency by the grinding blandness of American commercialization. I should know; I eat there once a week and suggest Taco Bell to all my friends. To illustrate my point, I have included a table that compares the Taco Bell Seven Layer Burrito to the sham that is the OSI seven layer model.
